Coffee engine

We enter July. The month which I have been keeping at bay for months because of ghost events which I thought could be problematic. Yet....now they are here, I look forward to them.
The weekend took our team to an event called BATTLEFIELD PARANORMAL where teams from around the country got together on the eve of the biggest battle in England, at the actual site.
My Ouija board didn't work great at all and it was all my stupid fault.
But, I managed to have a good time anyway.
It was good to be away with our team as we shave two new members joining from here on in. Two major festival events doing the ghost stuff blurs into Jam Radio stuff too. July is mental for me time wise.
But I'm so glad I'm back on board with the ghost side of things.

Today at work a lad brought in his coffee maker and it was lovely.
It fuelled my afternoon as I flew out of work to the radio station to discuss upcoming events and promotion. Then I sped to the cinema to watch STORAGE 24, from there I drove to IKEA to buy a table and use only the top as a new OUIJA BOARD. From their I got home for tea at 9pm. So I juggled having to send e mails and cooking tea and drawing Ouija board letters and face booking as I started to watch 'CONFESSIONS OF A DANGEROUS MIND'. The coffee I downed will fly me through till midnight onwards. Tomorrow is the new spiderman film with my son, Thursday is a friend coming and that means I miss the last new release of the week, JOYFUL NOISE, but something has to give before our first event on Friday evening. But Friday is work, festival shop to man two tables , radio and ghost ones. Then radio meeting, then event. I can't squeeze more minutes in without stopping going bed.
But I am my own boss and happy. I am still creating something most of the time. I have things to show for my time. Turning 38 soon means nothing. I am satisfied and happy.
I don't have too much time for the voices in my head to gang up on me. The same juggling of needing people's nice comments and yet hating not being alone with myself or my son, still is playing out in my head but I don't have time to dwell.

As the small hours approaches , will the coffee fixes propel me through a mental crash which will bring down this house of cards?
It's all about control. I used to spin three plates but now I spin three on each hand all the time. Even going to bed means that I first have to write my diary and log the films in the back which I've watched that day. Cinema tickets are collected and boxed according to the year it is. This blog has to be written now and again. Facebook, twitter, Soundcloud music made, e mails, writing my radio show including news and reviews.......and there's still loads I want to do each day.

I'm like a machine. To slow is to dwell .
I could keep writing but it's too long already.
Maybe that's the coffee.