Health

I got an app called MOVES at the weekend which tracks your step amount, calories burnt etc. Yesterday it says I walked for two and a quarter miles whilst just manning my machine at work for 9 hours. 5000 steps approx. Not bad for an average working day. 

This is in addition to the 7 minute workout which I am in my first week of doing daily. 

Naturally the 'healthy' bug has hit now and I'm thinking 'hmm maybe I'll buy salad'. This all has to be good of course and I'm even drinking water daily as well as less coffee. Will I live longer? Probably not. 

New PPS write up

8TH March 2014. Saturday. The Print Works. 

Due to our investigation at the Wooly sheep pub in Skipton being postponed we decided in order to keep our hand in we would gather once again at the print works. The people present are Si, Sue Sharpe, Sue Rhodes, Lee, Kevin, Gill and myself. During our set up my torch switched itself on. Having an early sign at this location is now an expected thing. Once seated and protection was done we ask the glass on our ouija board to answer our desire for communication. The glass moves quickly and readily which was a relief.We see the large circles of movement signifying a build up of spiritual energy. Put simply this is achieved by a process of E=Mc2. The amount of MOVEMENT equals the amount of ENERGY present, always. The glass uses this energy to go firstly to C and then to U. 

Gill "I can see you?" 

"If you can see us, where are you stood?" The glass moves to where Gill is. 

We jump to gather additional answers to those we have got from past investigations hopefully shedding some light on where and how spirits communicate from.  

Chris "Where are you talking to us from?" T-U (Huh?)

Si "Do you need our eyes to see?" This stems from a blindfold experiment we did with a oujia board last year. 

"Do you have to use us in some way?" NO

"What do you use?" P-E-O-P-L-E followed by quick spinning circles. 

The glass loses all fingers except Si's and my own. 

Chris "What is the connection between spirits and the living participants?" 

"How do we help you energise?" No answers. 

Gill "Have some of us met you before?" YES

Glass 'Q' 

Gill "Is there a queue of spirits?" no answer. 

"Is the a question for us?" NO

I explain to this spirit that at the Picture House cinema in Keighley a spirit went to the letter Q and we had wondered if that was shorthand for QUESTION. The glass just meanders around. 

Chris "Maybe you could show us a sign which you wish to represent 'Don"t Know'.

The glass moves to an empty corner of the board. 

"OK this will be 'Don't Know'" 

It should be said that after this investigation we have now labelled the board with a space for 'Don't Know' and also 'No Comment'. 

Si "Are you male?" YES

Gill "Are you connected to anyone round the table?" NO

"But you've spoken to some of us ?" YES

Gill "Do we know you by name?" NO

Chris "So you are not one of our close regular spirit friends?" NO (I was expecting either LUKE or DAVID to be the one).

Chris "When spirits do odd movements which we see no apparent meaning for, is there another reason for this?" 

F-U-N.

At this, there is a wacky and erratic glass movement as if to demonstrate. 

Si "Can you do other things other than move this glass?" Glass moves to 'don't know.' 

"Does our equipment worry you?" NO

Gill "Did you turn on the torch earlier?" YES.

Si "How many times did you turn it on?" 'Don't Know'

Gill and Si both hear a noise and upon our recreating the noise ourselves they say it sounded male. 

Chris "Can you tell us your name please?" NO

"Can you give us a false name then?" NO 

Si "What shall we refer to you as then?, we try to be respectful" 'Don't Know'

Chris "Can you remember who you are?" YES. the glass circles this word which we have learnt to represent what we call underlining which obviously means a definite answer.  

A thought about reincarnation pops to mind. 

"Have you had more than one identity?" YES

"Do you KNOW that you've had more than one life?" YES 

Gill "How many?" no comment. 

Si "Can you choose to have another identity?" No Comment. 

Chris "Do us living have any cause to worry about the afterlife?" Don't Know. 

The glass goes dead and energy-less. 

We acknowledge that we had been lucky with such an energetic start. We see a fingerprint on the side of the glass 

but decide it's nothing of note. 

When we ask out again the glass moves to W-A-W-A-W-A. Then goes dead again. 

Once something moves the glass again I ask if it would move to the centre of the board. 

Dead glass again. 

Si activates his walkie talkie saying  "You can always speak to us on this"

Gill "Is someone playing with my hair?" 

Another quiet spell with no movement.

 Si "Can you make a loud bang for us?" 

The walkie falls over as Si knocks loudly. We jump, which amuses us all. 

Si tries his whistling to get an answer too. "Make a bang....slam a door?" 

Nothing audible except noises in our heads which seems common hear. Its like hearing in thought which sounds odd I know.

The glass finally starts to circulate. 

A new spirit is with us. This next section centres around a very 'impossible' occurrence which i was the centre of. This location is my place of work day to day. Three years ago my marriage ended in as pleasant a way as is possible. But end it did and I decided one day that I needn't hang on to my wedding ring. I felt that it was nothing more than a cheap ring that should be discarded without fuss. If I held on to it I worried it would hold some sorrowful memory with it each time i stumbled across it. So I buried it deep in a tin of waste ink which after three or four weeks would be thrown in the  special waste bin and never be seen again. I remember pushing it in with a broken bit of pallet so as not to mucky my finger. Printing ink is a hard thing to get off.  These materials are disposed of in some way, separate from household rubbish. I unsurprisingly had brief second thoughts about throwing the ring away months later but too bad right? the thing was long gone. I never gave it any real thought as it was over and done. 

Except it wasn't done. It turned up in an impossible way. 

Here is my post i wrote about it's reappearance.

The Ring

1092 days ago I buried my wedding ring deep in a tin of ink at work. I did so without malice or anger but merely new it was a meaningless item marking out a something which had rotted into a meaningless relationship.  

Maybe a year later I thought my ring burial had been harsh as I am quite a keeper of tokens from my life. This one should've probably been kept more than many others , certainly above cinema ticket stubs and other useless tat which I can't throw away. 

Anyway, the ring was long gone. 

So what? Gone is gone. 

Three days to go until it is three years ago that I became a happy single man again. 

This morning I pull out my works scarf from my works bag which only  contains my scarf, emergency deodorant, emergency book and emergency fluff and grit (which I don't remember stashing).

I lift out my scarf and see a glistening object is sat upon the scarf as it raises from within my bag. I recognise it instantly as something which I got rid of. 

So I guess the natural explanation is that firstly I never submerged it in ink at all and just pictured what it would be like to do so. But f I had kept such an item I know from being predictable that I would not keep it safe in the bottom of my works bag. It would be kept in my 'keep things safe' cupboard which is in my bedroom. 

Plus the only thing to raise out of my bag on a daily basis is my scarf which I had stuffed in the afternoon before and shouldn't have a ring neatly sat on top of it. 

Am I to take this as some kind of message from the universe? 

Is it a message from the universe that I have won this award for finally being able to move on to pastures new? Is my guardian angel proposing to me? Just how does something you got rid of come back to you? 

 

It's odd. But odd things have been happening to me recently as if someone is guiding my thoughts to where they should be. 

I just wanted to log this occurrence as these little impossibilities happen now and again and for some reason we forget them soon enough. 

If it's a sign that I am going to remarry one day then I'm not certain I'm happy about that. I've been punished enough. 

So back to the 2014 investigation. 

 

Si "Are you a lady?" YES

"Do you know who Chris is?" YES

"Take the glass to Chris" It comes to me. 

"Do you know about the wedding ring?" YES 

"What about it?" S-T-O-L-E-N. Maybe a little more info is needed. 

"From where?" P-A-I-N-T. 

Now all of us around the board had heard me refer to the INK as INK and so even those who suspect ouija work is primarily the living subconsciously steering the glass, we would have steered it,as a a group to I-N-K. 

The fact it spelt Paint, I felt, was a good sign of movement independent of the team.    

"Who stole it?" ME

Chris "WHY?" N-I-C-E.

"Are you also who returned it to me?" YES

Chris "Did you see me bury it?" YES

Gill "What year did he bury it?" Don't Know.  

I explained to those of the team who hadn't heard my ring story about how i'd totally got rid of it and the members who had heard the story said they still thought that the ring had stayed on the premises and that i could figuratively speaking still get my hands on the thing. This was simply not the case. 

Gill "When you found the ring, was it still in the 'paint'?' YES

"Where did you find the paint?" Nothing. 

Sue R "Did you want chris to have it back?" Nothing. 

Chris "Why had you returned something that essentially, i didn't want?" 

Gill "What was the reason?"    I-M-P-O-R-T-A-N-T. 

Gill "Is it important to Chris?" YES. 

It's fair to say that I had grown to regret in some way, throwing the ring away. My marriage, ended or not was still a massive event in my life today. 

Gill "Why is it important to Chris?" N-I-C-E.

"Because the ring itself is nice?" YES

Chris "Err well, Thanks" 

Gill "Can you spell the name of the town you found it in?" Don't Know. 

Si "Have you a link with Chris?" NO

Gill "Do you think he should've kept it?" YES

Chris "What's around you, what can you see?" G-O-L-G 

"Try that again" G-O-L-D. "What is gold?" L-I-G-H-T. 

A golden light, that is intriguing. 

Gill "What does the golden light represent?" Don't know. 

Si "Is there darkness there?" YES

"Other colours?" YES 

"Is the darkness good?" No Answer.

Chris "Are there buildings there?" YES

'People?" YES

"What do you call the place?" No comment. 

Si "Is it a different name for different people?" YES

Gill "Take glass to where you are stood" Glass moves to between Gill and Si. 

Gill "What is your name?" P-A-T

Si "Is that your real name?" NO

Gill "How old are you?" 69

"You were 69 when you died?" YES

Gill "How many years since you died?" The glass does a load of messing about.

Gill "Is someone stroking my hair?"  YES

I take my finger off. 

Si "Pat were you married?" U- NO...U- NO. 

Gill "Who knows?" The glass moves in long straight strokes forwards and backwards.

Sue goes cold. 

Chris "This isn't Pat anymore is it?" Gill sees a shadow move across the wall behind Lee and I. Gillis sat opposite us with one of a couple of torches behind her. Gill jumped a lot at the sight of this shadow. Gill and Sue S both lean in front of the torch behind them and can not recreate the shadow because they totally block out the torch light when the obscure it themselves. We can't debunk this or even come close to recreating it. 

Chris "Tell us who the shadow was" The glass becomes noticeably stronger as it goes repeatedly from the centre to in front of me or the letter V which is right in front of me. 

Then the glass does larger circling. 

Our fingers are spun off the glass as it's movement throws us off. It is myself who has their finger on the glass last. 

Now, I want to just expand on this moment. Picture yourself with only your finger on the glass in front of you and the glass is dragging around the board as if circling a dinner plate. The glass was moving anti clockwise and when, from my angle it was at 12 o'clock, my arm was fully outstretched. As the glass moved further it went to 9 o'clock and then 6 o'clock where my arm was tucking in towards my body. Now picture your arm towards your body as mine was. As the glass continued it's circular journey through 4 o'clock, 3 o'clock onwards, your arm is straightening out. Si's finger was second to last off as the glass shot round 4 o'clock. My finger was on the glass right the way round until it stopped at about 1 o'clock. 

Two things revealed themselves at this stage. 1/ momentum carried it to some degree in it's final stages but 2/ I instantly realised my arm had nowhere else to go under it's own weight. That limb was shooting out even just this small way was forced to complete it's outstretch to full extension  because of the weight of my hand plus momentum. 

I didn't PUSH the glass willingly but my arm was definitely the cause for that last six inches or so. It struck me that with 5 or 6 people around the table, all of us contributing our own 6 to 7 inches of arm extending that we could be at fault for some of the movement. 

However, and this is all part of me trying to wear believer and cynical hats together, this influence of ours would make it even harder for the glass to do what it often does, which is to violently change direction in an erratic fashion.  

The glass was getting more crazed in it's actions. Sue said she kept getting goosebumps. 

There was a sense of anticipation growing and a feeling of mischief brewing. E=MC2. What was the spirit planning to use this energy on? 

The glass lost all but Si and I who were sat next to each other. This meant that we would detect each other deliberately pushing the glass but we were in agreement that we could feel the glass pulling away from us and then twisting with us barely hanging on. 

Chris "Do something violent or throw the glass off the table" I wasn't provoking, I was inviting solid evidence. The atmosphere changed as the glass flew off the table smashing onto the floor at our feet.  

I went and got my reserve glass. Once again Si and I ended up with just our fingers on and it moving wildly.

At this point, baring in mind what I'd just realised about our limb involvement, even for an instant,  the glass moved with stunning direction changes and possibly the fastest flow to my memory, right until it went completely empty of life. 

We took a break to clear the broken glass up and gather our thoughts. 

As Lee and Sue Rhodes discussed this just outside the door whilst having a cigarette, Lee noticed the small crack of light between door and frame went dark and the door shut them out. They opened the door inwards into the building and knew that no living person was responsible. There was no wind at that moment and wind would have blown the door inwards and more open if there had been.  

We tried table tipping but got nowhere with that so we were left with going back to the board. This time I used my flat round see through plastic planchette with a black dot on it. It's kinda like a coaster. 

We had contact again and as the glass spelt C-U-B-S, Si saw a shadow. 

Si "Do you like this planchette?" NO 

We swap to my spare glass identical to the first one. The glass seems to move from S to R to S to R to S to R. Then to middle to T to middle to U then rotates in corcles followed by left to right to left to right. 

We start to ask for answers about our NO PROTECTION experiment some months earlier. We had been scrying using a wet mirror with mixed results and it wasn't until we finally protected ourselves at the end that normal spirit communication started and told us to go home while it tried to clean up our spirit mess we'd caused whist being dangerous. 

Chris "Can you confirm in some way that you were indeed present on no protection night?"  F-A-I-L  O-N  C-O-N-T-R-O-L. 

At the time I was sort of  convinced by this reply in the thinking that we failed to fully experiment with the spirits because someone was looking out for us as we were trying to push boundries at our will. Now I write this up I have to admit Im a little more dubious about it being a good response. 

Si "Did we do the right thing (trying with no protection)?" NO

"Is it ok now?" YES

"Did we cause spirits extra work?" YES

This spirit claims to be that very PROTECTOR from that night but not 'our new guardian' as Gill asks. 

Chris "What tips have you for us getting in touch with spirit?" T-H-I-S. 

Si "So we just have to ask out?" YES

"Does it matter if we leave the lights on?" NO. 

Si "Could you show us what actions you were protecting us from?" The glass moves diagonally corner to corner repeatedly. 

"Do we not know the half of it?" NO

"Do you know what todays date is?" 8th (It is)

"Is time the same on your side?" NO

Gill "Where are you stood now?" Glass points to Sue S. 

Chris "I will hold up some fingers behind my back without the team seeing and can you go to the number of how many" Eventually the glass chooses don't know. I'd rather that than it get it wrong. 

Chris "can you give us any personal info?" NO 

Lee "Did you close the door on us?" NO 

"Do you know who did?" S-T-U then backwards U-T-S

Gill "are there any more spirits?" S-T-U   S-T-U   S-T-U

Si thinks he hears a voice a few times. Si tries to find if one of us knows STU. 

The glass seems to identify Sue R but doesn't stick to that answer. When Si asks if STU is relevant to anyone else, the glass does often reply U. 

The glass keeps moving in front of me but we learn it's over U. U .U.

The glass moves to balance on the edge of the table. It would seem to be perfectly balanced half on half off. We see if it is ....CRASH.....no it wasn't. That's 2 glasses smashed. 

We use plastic planchette once more and spin the board around so that the letters are in front of different people now. 

The spirit still spells STU and when Gill asks if there's anything after that It says STUART. 

Si makes a connection between a Stu and a Pat from his life and we ask controlled questions to discover if the spirit knows correct answers. There is little decent evidence to identify exactly as such, which Si would be the first to admit, especially in the light that HIS Pat was male and ours was supposedly female.  It ended on a bit of a head scratcher. 

That was the end of that. On to the next one.......   

Sunday Zombies

On Sunday morning I got up at 6:30am because my body insisted I did. It had also insisted I had been in bed at 10pm the previous night. I've since read that this is how to get the best sleep. Have the same routine every day. After watching a film plus tv series I donned my coat and shoes to have my walk whilst listening to a podcast before most people were even up. I looked for my latest earphones. The ones which finally fit my ear holes well enough to be happy with. 

They were nowhere to be found. I believe they have fallen out of my pocket at some stage. I refused to walk with earphones and wasn't about to walk whilst wearing my large over ear ones no matter how good the sound. 

A few hours later on I decided I would drive to the Dalesway pub and have one of their £2.50 refill mugs from the costa coffee machine and read my latest copy of Empire magazine and maybe even write on my iPad.  I made the journey to discover their machine was broken this week. I left and drove further realising I didn't actually have a back up plan. All I knew though was that after I was in Bingley I had a sense that this was less where I was meant to be.  I listened to the feeling in my stomach and turned around and headed back homewards. 

Suddenly, it was decided. I would drive to Ilkley and drop some PPS leaflets off as I looked for a nice place to sit for an hour. 

I found a bistro after my leaflet posting and enjoyed a nice coffee. I had thought that simply sitting at home watching endless films was perhaps bad for the soul. Maybe it was time to put my face back in the crowd a little. As I drank I overheard the different sets of well-to- do types laugh and chat in the slightly well  spoken way which the Ilkley residents do. It is a lovely place. 

But what they were saying was the same old crap any set of people talk about. Meals they ate, things their partners had said which had made them mad and gossip amongst other trivia. 

I knew at that point that I had missed nothing by submerging myself in the silver screen. People sat about and had a drink which may have been relaxing but it also felt, to me only maybe, like a large waste of precious time. Surely they had tv series to watch at home or books to read or any number of things. 

Most of what I overheard made me desperate to return home and plough through American Horror Story Asylum, read my book and write my ghost team write up. These people would see their day pass with little progress to show for it. On my drive home I saw people off to five a side football or similar and In my opinion, I wouldn't like that more than what I do. 

It served as a great refocus on what I DO enjoy. 

My life is just fine. 

Easter bank holiday Monday

I watched about 8 episodes of series 2 of Parks And recreation and really enjoyed it. I finished reading Biocentrism book too which felt like progress. The rest of my morning was taken up with seeing Transcendence at the cinema. What a load of Twoddle. But that aside , I still enjoyed it. 

In the afternoon I collected my son and we rejoiced in each other's company knowing we have two and a half days together. We have chosen our plans of going out and have our fingers crossed for suitable weather. I am fully aware that it's our little trips out are where we create memories. 

 

Time travel part 7

TIME TRAVEL PART 7. 

It was 1995 April 20th and it's a thursday evening. I was sat alone in my bedroom at my mothers surrounded by my belongings still in boxes from the move here and waiting for my first new house to be available to move to alone.  8:56pm my diary says. I sat at my black ash writing desk with a glass of southern comfort in my hand. Drop Dead Fred was playing on my tv. As the drink flowed and the bottle liquid reduced in content I slowly wrote in my diary as follows;

I FEEL LIKE SHITE. 

I NEED A GIRLFRIEND...NOT 'WANT'A GIRLFRIEND. WE ARE TALKING 'NEED' A GIRLFRIEND. 

I WANT MY OWN SANCTUARY. 

DO I WANT ATTENTION? WELL, NOT FROM MANY, JUST ONE. 

AM I REALLY A LOSER WHO CAN'T ADMIT IT OR HAVE I SOME HIDDEN TALENT. 

PAIN MAKES YOU ALIVE. 

WHY DO I ANALYSE? 

I AM HOPELESS. I DON'T FEEL SUICIDAL. I JUST FEEL UNOPTIMISTIC ABOUT THE FUTURE. 

A few glasses more and accompanied by listening to nine inch nails, I wrote more.... 

I FUCK MYSELF UP, REDUCING MYSELF TO A PILE OF EMOTIONS ONE DAY, WILL I FIND LOVE? IT SOMETIMES FEELS IMPOSSIBLE. 

AM I A FAILURE? I NEED MY OWN HOME BUT WOULD THAT MAKE ME WHOLE OR WILL THAT MAGNIFY MY BAD PARTS? 

I NEED SOMEONE TO BE WITH ME BUT I'M LONELY AS HELL!!!!

It was at this point that I took a knife of some sort and cut BROKEN into my forearm.  

Now....19 years later, as i sit having grown up and not had a drink for almost three years, I see it as more pathetic than I ever thought I would. I was broken in a way. I saw a huge unknown chunk was missing from me inside. In actual fact it was this missing element which actually makes me who I am. If you will, it's like the anti matter in the universe which is invisible but is the GLUE to our existence. 

With age you learn. Relationships were vital to me but the end game (Or so it appears today) was that I didn't need another to make me whole. The scars have luckily faded from those days and I have evolved into a superior version of myself. Single, yes, but whole. My feelings and thoughts were actually my best features. Perhaps only from my perspective but that's all that counts. 

I was teetering on the brink of a big fall and trying to numb myself of the pain i knew was about to start. Living alone was going to see me swim with my own demons. Now I've met my demons I learnt where they get their powers from. This led to me knowing what to take away to take their powers too. 

The demons are in me but haven't been fed and watered for years.    

It's other people who throw food at them now even though the sign says "Please don't feed the demons". 

Time is indeed a healer and the solution is often found out by mistake. HOLD THE FUCK ON AND KNOW YOUR DAY IS GOING TO COME. 

Easter 2014

We are stood at work on Good Friday until lunchtime and even though the boss is away, we are all knuckling down. Not out of some solidarity for the company but rather because it makes the time go quicker. Knowing that most people are at home with their feet up somewhat makes today feel like a race to join them. 

I've bought my nephews and step kids bags of chocolates instead of Easter eggs proper. Two readings- one, I imagined there was more chocolate in one of these bags than there was in a wide shell of an egg. Two, the egg deal proudly claimed 3 Easter eggs for £10. I should bloody think so. I had 7 to buy and so would've spent over £20 when in fact I spent £7. It's like Easter eggs think the cardboard they gone in is valuable to us too. 

Fuckers. 

Actually though, I know feel like I'm going to feel cheap handing a bag of chocolates over to each teenager. But would that feeling not happening have been worth an exorbitant price tag. I guess not. 

It's important to remember the true meaning of Easter. When Jesus was crucified and his body came back to life and he joined those who had killed him in eating a shit load of Easter eggs until they felt sick whilst singing 'always look on the bright side of life'. something  like that anyway. 

Good Friday

We had a ghost investigation last night at a private house. It was laid back but our patients meant the findings from the ouija board were legible. As emotionally responsive questions were discussed, the gauss meter crackled into more and more life. Hopefully our work there settled a long going reaquaintance. 

Today is Good Friday and the roads lie very silent. Only half a day for us anyway so the sun has given us a total feeling of holiday starting feelings already. 

I will soak up my 5 year old son this holiday and bask in the sheer joy he delivers. We have many plans together. Life is good and I aim to enjoy it.   

Tranquility

You find me in a somewhat tranquil moment of the year. Easter is this weekend and I am off a few days of next week. There's no massive overtime currently and that allows for a relaxed carry on. The shutter is up at work and the light and fresh air adds to the pleasant feeling. 

A family Easter visit is on the cards and seeing much more of my son makes for something to look forward to. Everyone busies themselves within their bubbles of existence. Each evening I watch a programme on physics and read a book on Biocentrism. It's been very enlightening and has led me to further videos explaining theories on YouTube. I'm learning more now than I did at school. 

After turning Sky tv back on (for a quarter of the original price) I encountered my first annoyance yesterday. I spent about eight minutes flicking for something to watch and also watched something fruitless of meaning which made me realise that sky tv is a great way to lose time to nothingness. Be it watching quiz shows which do little but fill time or even worse, search for something to watch for ages. 

I'm not sure how long it will be before I switch it off again. 

Karate San (son)

Today I went to my son's karate grading as he went from white belt to red belt. I was proud of him and I was glad that both his mum and I could happily attend together. I have moaned about the cost of karate but now seeing what he learns, I don't mind as much. 

It teaches discipline and confidence which can only be good. 

His mum says she wants to introduce him to things which will keep him off the streets. 

He is a gift to us and exudes a strength in me which seems infinite. I continued to add his pictures, drawings and certificates to a scrap book I made about him called 'The greatest human who ever lived'. 

Sun April

It's a friday, mid April and the sun is shining on me as I sit awaiting my son coming out of school. I've been here an hour and a half after delivering for work. I've eaten my lunch and watched Michael McIntyre talk show and started to read a Biocentrism even though I'm only half way through 'Proof Of Heaven'. The ponderous questions about life have consumed me all my years. I am taking my son to karate tomorrow to be graded for his red belt. I believe we are going swimming afterwards. A lovely time for us both. 

I've arranged to have a reunion of sorts in the middle of the year, around my 40th birthday which will get y old drinking crowd back together. I had second thoughts initially as I imagined nobody would come. They still may not of course.  

I'm in a good moment in life and still searching for other ways to keep happy and grow as a human.l

The sun is shining on me for sure.

(1000th Post) 100th birthday.

Today my son and I went to a 100th birthday party. My dad's aunties which means I don't know how to describe how she's related to me by a phrase but she is my grandmas sister. It's not often you get to go to one of these although my Grans side seem to be the ones to offer such things. I had to pick my son up from school first and everyone had been eating tea there by the time we arrived. I saw my brothers and other family members but mostly I didn't have a clue who most people were. There was a large board with our family tree on though which I was most impressed with. I'm long descended from a couple who had 13 children. The birthday girl sat frail but with a silver tiara on her head. She's an impressive lady. We all come from somewhere but are forgotten a few generations later to be meaningless names. It's a significant event in both my mine and my sons lives that we attended a birthday such as this. I didn't actually talk to the birthday girl as I didn't think she'd know who we were since I'd been less than ten when I'd see her at Xmas. 

My fridge died yesterday and came around and gave me his credit card and pin number. Very trusting. I take that as some kind of compliment. Also my ghost team mate has booked us to go on two investigations later this year which are opportunities to learn the tech side of things a bit better. Looking forward to that. 

I'm also reading a book called 'Proof Of heaven' which is about a Near Death Experience of a neuroscientist who was in a coma. I'd recommend it entirely. 

I love my life still. I'm happy inside and feel I get what path I have to take. All is well. No dark thoughts. 

The bottle of water

There was a Robinson's juice bottle which had been emptied of juice and refilled with tap water at work but left untouched for days. I'd seen it sat on a table at work and it never reduced in liquid. That set my mind in motion. How long would it sit there without being thrown out? A week? A month? A year? Slowly gathering dust, this water would become something form just a redundant present day item to a historical casket of liquid matter which held within it a time which had passed. It was the end of March and so come April, which it is now, it would become every so slightly rarer. The water now sits as a product of earths atmosphere from March 2014. Sure, there are probably shelves of drinks in shops and houses which can lay claim to that and some maybe, even older. But the hope of my not returning to it to find it emptied grew. 

I had permission from its owner to keep it from being discarded. 

The water did not full the bottle in its entirety and held air at the top. As some old record played on the radio I allowed my mind to fast forward to this bottles future in my possession. I imagined myself producing this bottle to show my son in ten years when he was about to turn 16 and saying "you were 5 when this water and air was circling the globe. Many people have died since this was securely bottled". It was something trivial and profound to me at the same time. I am in the final months of being able to say I'm in my thirties and this bottle of water holds the air I breathed whilst 39. I could still hold this bottle in one piece  if I reached 100. What about my own son or his son still having it when they reached 100. Imagine having a bottle of water from 100 years ago. 200? 300? Worthless and priceless all at the same time.

I imagined this becoming a family heirloom of fascinating stupidity. "This bottle of water has been handed down generation after generation and is from 500 years ago this year" someone would say. "My great great great great great grandfather was so ridiculous that he kept this bottle of water and his catalogue collection from now redundant companies and made it possible that we could hold them in our hands today". This is why I show this uninteresting item today. Someday it will be the thing of miracles. 

C whitehouse. 2014. (The man who had too much thinking time)  

Motivation goes

Motivation, where did you go? 

Is it because the clocks have gone back? No because it was a few days before that that it stopped. Following a week where I had my head full of ideas for stories and writings etc, it all ceased. My suspicions are that it's PPS related as I see motivation disappear from others. But maybe it's something else. 

I'm almost at my 1000th entry on this blog and I can't decide whether to make that blog entry about my relatives 100th birthday or a bottle of water. Sounds silly but they both have important tales to tell. I'm also aware that I should do some more A WEEK IN MY LIFE entries. 

I'll have to mull it over some more.