The world feels like something I am once again shying away from. My team mate has started to really make some good connections for us in our local area. But I am feeling less enthusiastic about it than the rest. I feel like I'm dragging my heels or more correctly they are dragging me with them.
I wouldn't budge on my rule of not changing my days which I have my son in order to do a ghost team event. I'm now beating myself up about it but I'm also proud of myself for sticking to my guns and being upfront about it.
I am in a good mood in myself still but I have that feeling in my bones of wanting to clock out from the world even further and sit doing nothing.
In some ways every second of my life is a relaxing time which I control. But in the other it seems that I'm always writing or planning etc.
I'm having a funny turn in the light of expanding with the radio work and the ghost investigations. My mind tells me we will look a twat soon. Something will not go as planned in the future because less planning is being done.
We are operating with luck on our side but that luck will run out soon.
I feel like the member of a band that is getting famous and I don't want the fame, and yet, don't want to stop the others from getting famous. I'm an awkward sod.
There's no pleasing some people and I'm one of those people I'm afraid to say. I'm just cut from a different cloth.
With 'fame' comes less freedom by the sounds of it.
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