My wife asked me to go to the supermarket to get her 'lady products' and I hate doing it. I should have no business with such matters,it's as if  there's a party going on and I'm not invited.
But I did go to buy them.
I made a list of lots of other things to basically camouflage the offending item. I walked quickly and confidently up the aisle of womanhood and saw Tampax which I had been told not to buy. I saw a box and I knew two shop assistance were watching me so I mouthed "how the fuck would  I know which to buy",  so they knew I wasn't a regular purchaser of such items. I threw a box into the basket and went to pay choosing the quietest lane.
Satisfied that I'd managed to be brave enough to complete the task I arrived back home. 
"they're not the right ones" she started. I wasn't going back.
I countered "what makes you think I'm a connoisseur of sanitary towels? All I know is I've seen em play tennis  on the tv in them so they must be ok"
"these are panty liners, I don't buy these" she replied.
She was mad that she would have to go out in the cold. What a cheek after I'd just had to.
Anyway I just went in the shower cos I couldnt think of more stuff to buy to cover them again. 
Would  I ask her to buy nob scrub or testicle wipes.....NO.
 It's up to her to keep her under carriage hygienic isn't it. I know I'm married to her but we don't need to share everything. Im told homosexuals buy tampons to deal with their practices so I felt highly uncomfortable buying them and that should be reason enough not to. 
I'm telling you now " I draw the line at vagisil!"