I am on a pub crawl of sorts. My new area of Silsden has a smattering of pubs which I am curious about seeing the insides of. On my journey if the moment is right, I shall present my OI business card to. My first stop 'The Robin Hood', has a roaring fire and a claim of free WiFi in the window. A young lad made me paranoid at the bar, coming back from the toilet and giving me a sneaky glance and then making a phone call and going outside. As I write this it sounds like an unsubstantiated claim of possible aggro, but I am in the one pub I have been warned about. I am a new face in these pubs and it feels like it.
The language is questionable in here. Snippits include "Spunk on the bonnet and pubes in the doorhandles", and I am not joking when I say that it was said loudly by the barmaid. I have used the free WiFi and exhausted my updates. I really miss it at home. I had a message say I have an 8 day wait for broadband at home. 

Wow, pub number 2, 'The Red Lion' is like a waiting room for death. No music or heating. Three men pissed talking about nothing. They are slagging off the pub that I've been to previously and one further on which is also a wasteland. The men continue to talk about the demise of this pub as the strong smell of disinfectant fills my nostrils and makes my stomach swirl. Apparently "this is a real pub" said one of the men. 

I got up after two sips of watery beer and arose during their talk to put my pint on the bar and say "that pint's horrible" and then leave after putting it on the bar. That pub will not be around for long. Although it may be down to my taste buds as it was just regular John Smiths and not extra smooth. But to he'll with it, those old moaning fools needed my bombshell to shut them up talking about what a great pub it was. That was worth wasting three quid. 
Now I am in 'The Punch Bowl', which I have been in before and it's a nice atmosphere and there's music and tv on.
Ohh, awkward, I just saw a man turn and do an overall wave at the bar area saying "see you later" and nobody responding. I had a sense that the batman could have responded but chose not to bother. There seems to be a noticeable  honesty to these pubs where everyone is ok to your face but as soon as a person leaves, what follows is a truthful tear apart of their character.

In the 'Kings Arms' now to find a jovial fivesome halfcut and having fun. It's a breath of fresh air. Just as I thought, this is my favourite pub in Silsden. Ofcourse the free WiFi helps. 
Listening to this conversation is fascinating. A very posh crowd talking about servants living in their top floor. A posh clientele with their guard left down due to alcohol. It seems everyone is the same, we like to get pissed to forget the pain sometimes and in the morning we focus on a different pain(hangover). 
There's a surprising amount of cackling from these posh ladies which I find quite refreshing. 
I wondered what it meant by 'Open Mic' as I entered this pub. It would appear that it means you can turn up and do anything and noone can do a thing about it. I can hear cover versions being done by White haired Status Quo. The posh totty in the corner are enjoying it purely as they are inebriated. Ok, I'm off to my home now without the Internet. I will bore you later.