The wind was howling and the rain pouring as I returned my son home after we had enjoyed playing together at his grandmas. 
It gave his mother a great opportunity to finally spit out the thing she had been trying to say for weeks. "it's not a great idea this seeing him on a Monday thng is it?" 
"Why?" 
"Well it doesn't seem fair dragging him out in the dark and cold"
Jesus if he isn't allowed out in the cold or the dark then I won't see him until next July. If it snows....I get the point but otherwise I feel a bastard again for that decision being made by his mum when it effects he and I.  Will he think I have deserted him? 
I have no say in the matter because the stupid fucking law says that even though she made my life unpleasant, she gets to piss on my parade too. 
Equality...balls. 
At least she finally got it out though. 
I have one person in the world who I give my love to and an outsider rules how often I can see him. 

The world is one fucked up place people. 
I have to bounce back. I remember pointing out in my marriage how unfair it was that should anything come between us she would only lose me, the object of her problems. But if she pissed me off it would be I who had to leave and I would lose four people. Is that fair? Is it fuck. That's why men end up henpecked because they see it's better to keep their mouths shut than lose everything. 
Evil, pure evil. 

(I am mad at the situation more than personally attacking my Ex, who I actually get on with ok)


I just want to have a comfortable and stress free life. I am not the villain. 



Something I noticed today had me scratching my head too.
Here was the scenario;
I had to go delivering at some point but then the customer decided that they would collect.
Firstly I was told "the customer is now coming to collect that"
I answered with "oh are they?"
Now this is the wrong way around. The answer was given first and then I still followed it with the question which had been answered a second before. 
It happens all the time, eg "I going out tonight" 
"Are You?"
("Yes I just said I was didn't I? Idiot") Thats what should happen but it's become acceptable to do it the wrong way. Now I noticed it, it annoys me further.